Monday, February 28, 2011

Download: Bellez "EZ On Em"

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"Whatcha Know 'Bout This, Youngin?"

This old man is sickwidit. Something to kickstart your week.

Old Man Does The Old Man Dance - Watch more Funny Videos

Tail Report: 2011 Academy Awards

Be honest: The red carpet is the only part of the Oscars you were even remotely interested in watching. I know that's the case for me.

Halle Berry
The Michael Jordan of red carpet hotness.

Mila Kunis
Good to finally see her begin to rise into the upper echelon of actresses, which only means more opportunities to see her looking tasty at red-carpeted events.

Scarlett Johansson
Another of my recently-single dreamgirls. She's kind of got a naughty-hot thing going here. Like she'd drag you into a broom closet during the ceremony and make your eyes cross.

Jennifer Lawrence
She cleans up well, I've gotta say. She might have been the biggest "dayuuuuummmmm" of the night.

Jennifer Hudson
I can tolerate her a little more now that she's lost all the weight. A little...

Mallika Sherawat
...Yeah, I don't know who she is, either. But I want to get to know her better.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Throwback Thursday: "Best of Me (Remix)" -- Mya ft. Jay-Z

The throwbacks took a little break last week while some cold germs made me their bitch. This week the wayback machine returns with one of my all-time favorite tracks. Jigga spits straight fire in both verses, and Mya was at the peak of her sexiness (though, here's hoping her recent return to the public eye will bring about some a sexiness revival in her).

I'm still looking for a chick that'll "have an affair—act like an adult for once."

Daily Dunk: Jordan Green

This is how you close out your high school career. Green will be playing for Texas A&M next fall.

"Transformers: Dark of the Moon" Trailers

You've probably seen these by now, but I figured I'd put them all in one post for perspective. DOTM is set to be a huge film, with Michael Bay putting a cap on the trilogy with all of the firepower he can muster. I think it's safe to assume that I'll be at the midnight release for this just like I was for the last film, "Revenge of the Fallen".

Teaser Trailer

Trailer #1

Trailer #2

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

The Sweet Smell of Success

This is an idea whose time has come. I'm tempted to buy some, but...with the friends I have, I'd probably awake from a booze session to find one of them standing over me with a fork.

I'd imagine this is a must-own for chubby-chasers. Just saying...

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Tail Report: 2011 Grammy Awards

Yet again I'll say it: This is the only real value the Grammys, Emmys, Oscars, or any other award show has—hot women in skimpy dresses. Stated.

(click to images for larger versions)

Selena Gomez
Is this legal yet? I'm going to plead the fif on this one.

She's still not one of my favorites, but she's been growing on me lately. Hard to deny those legs. And if you saw them her when they she was on Chelsea Lately...dizzamn.

Consistently delish.

Jennifer Lopez
Still hurting 'em. Te amo, mami.

Kim K.
*prerequisite "Kim is sexy and in front of cameras for no real reason" picture*

Not as revealing as some of the others, but I'm just happy to see that Mya's alive and well after almost 10 years in exile.

Props to Max Power at Daddy's Sugar Ball for the Rihanna picture.

Women are Evil

"That was...cooolllld-blooooooodded!"

My fellas in the UK: If you ever cross paths with Belinda Heggen, beware her bitchy side.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Throwback Thursday: "Crossover" -- EPMD

There are a lot of acts in hip-hop today that need to heed these words from '92, real talk.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Big Leavenworth?

This... This is...

I'm literally speechless. There is so much "WTF" in this tourism video for Leavenworth, WA, that my brain has blue-screened on me.

From The Huffington Post:

The Leavenworth, Washington tourism office has created what could certainly be considered the most ludicrous, out-of-context ad ever.

...there is something mildly inappropriate and wildly entertaining about the ad the Leavenworth office created, highlighting a nutcracker that appears to be the town's mascot and breaking into a rap with women in lederhosen.

"He's cool like a kielbasa, and juicy like a brat..." I think there may be blood coming from my ears.

"Cross ya over boss, and toss you off course/ bow down ya lost..."

Meet Jordan McCabe. He's 12 years old, and he can out-dribble you. He can even do it while strolling through ESPN's newsroom.

Amber Rose, Sexter

Kanye's ex is the latest female "celeb" to have nude cameraphone pics leaked online (though, in her case I'm having a hard time believing that she didn't just leak them herself).

From Baller Status:

Popular urban-Tube website, WorldStarHipHop (WSHH), leaked at least six nude photos of the former-stripper-turned-model on Tuesday (February 8), claiming an unnamed source emailed them over.
Personally, I'm not a fan of hers. I don't dig the bald fade on chicks, and she seems to have the personality of a plate of mashed potatoes. But...I'd hit.

For the uncensored, NSFW pics, click here.

Good Vs. Evil

(1.) This is one of the best moments of "Family Feud" that I've ever seen (not that that's saying much).

(2.) It appears "Evil" is winning the aforementioned battle. Thank god.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Respect My Gangsta: Prince

Now, I know that here at CS we typically tend to kiss Kim K.'s ass (see previous post). And, as you might imagine, that takes a LOT of kissing. But ownage is ownage, and if anyone's going to check a celeb like Kim, it's going to be Prince.

From The Amplifier:
Last night at Madison Square Garden, Prince did what so many of us want to do, but simply cannot do: make Kim Kardashian go away. At the end of each of the singer's Welcome 2 America concerts in New York, he's invited VIPs onstage to dance -- and in Cyndi Lauper's case, belt a few notes. Yesterday one of his stellar backup singers took Kim by the hand and led her onstage, saying, "Look who I got." Prince busted a move; Kim stood and laughed. So he dismissed her with a neck-snapping, "Get off the stage!" as the crowd roared. "Welcome 2 America," he added, scanning the audience for another girl who "can get busy."

Kim claimed (via Twitter) that she froze up in nervousness, and that Prince later gave her a second chance (whereupon she redeemed herself by shaking that big ol' ass...come to think of it, why isn't there video of THAT available online?). But hopefully she learned an important lesson: if you want to be this generation's Apollonia, you listen to The Artist.

Monday, February 7, 2011

KK Tones Up

Kim K. does a Super Bowl ad, and now it's on Crooked Straight. Just what were the odds on that happening? 1-to-1, probably.

Of course, she's looking delish in this Skechers commercial. Who knew her perfect frame was all due to her shoes (especially since half the time we're not even aware that she's wearing shoes).

Imported from Detroit

Among this year's crop of Super Bowl ads was one from Chrysler preaching hometown pride, featuring hip-hop's King of Detroit, Eminem.

"Airplanes" on an Airplane

Passengers on a Delta flight to Los Angeles were given a quick performance by B.o.B. This comes after Kanye West performed a similar impromptu concert (though B.o.B.'s seems a little more staged than Ye's did) on a Delta flight in November.

Given their recent history of terrible customer satisfaction reviews, could this be a new marketing ploy by Delta? "Fly Delta, and you may be blessed with a surprise hip-hop show."

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Wrestle Mania

This is the best thing you'll watch today. I say that without a shadow of a doubt in my mind. If you think I'm bullshitting, just click "play".

Cover Girl

Kim Kardashian's still doing it. The likely recipient of Crooked Straight's "Lifetime Achievement in Pants Pressing" award—if one existed—is featured on the cover of the March 2011 issue of FHM UK. Grab hold of her—uhh, I mean... Grab hold of it—uhh, I mean...

Pick up a copy of this fine periodical on newsstands now.

Charlie's Devils

Looks like someone's been planning for life after "Two and a Half Men".

From The Huffington Post:
Sheen, who was hospitalized after a night of partying with porn stars, prostitutes and cocaine -- and is now headed to rehab, though that may come at home -- allegedly wanted to create a "porn family" and now we know why. Turns out, he wanted them to star in his latest productions, if his madam is to be believed.

Sheen's madam, who goes by the name of Felony, told Radar Online that he was planning out an entire porn franchise, to be titled 'Charlie's Devils.'

"Charlie and I were having this great project and he was talking about performing in front of the camera," Felony said. He even made a demo: "Charlie's got the tape. I gave it to him afterwards," the madam said. "He was keeping it so he could practice."
I tell you, I'm not necessarily sad for Sheen over how his life and career have gone. No, I'm mad at drugs for being hazardous to one's health. If cocaine didn't have the audacity to potentially kill you, Sheen's life could only get cooler and cooler with every passing sniff.

Respect My Gangsta: Brent Johnson

For hockey fans, this is one of the highlights of the season. For Penguins fans, this is one of the highlights of the franchise's history. For the rest of you, who just enjoy watching someone get dropped by a mean left, this is one of the highlights of your day.

If you mess with Johnson's teammates, he WILL fuck your day up. Stated.

Throwback Thursday: "Renee" -- Lost Boyz

I still listen to this track a few times a week, but somehow never thought to use it for a Thursday Throwback before. Good looks to my boy Serge, whose Facebook post put the idea in my head. For me, this is one of those songs that takes you back to study hall in high school the second the first note drops. I'm still looking for my Renee (*looks at Jessica Burciaga* No?...Nothin?...*sigh*).

Tail Report: Evelyn Lozada

Somehow, we never managed to properly cover the announcement that Mr. Ochocinco (soon to be Mr. Johnson again) had gotten engaged to Antoine Walker's ex. So, allow me to say the following...

If that last picture caught you by surprise, then you must've missed the news like I did: Naked pictures that Evelyn sexted to an ex (not Walker) have been leaked onto the internet. To see the full uncensored gallery of them at The YBF, click here.