Monday, October 20, 2014

Monday Kickstart: Cocked and Ready for Danger

Navigating public transportation can be hard. Complete strangers crammed together, competing over stiff seats. And you always seem to end up stuck next to some prick.



...Psshh, what a dick.

This week's motivation comes all the way from Europe, in the form of gorgeous Dutch model Nancy Lynn De Ronde:


Let's go.

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Throwback Thursday: "Testify" -- Common

I'm usually not a fan of videos that are turned into huge productions, but in this case it perfectly matches the cinematic rhyme that Common spits over one of Kanye's finer beats. And any extra chance to see Taraji's fine self, I'm all for it.


Tuesday, October 14, 2014

A Beautiful Symphony

Because, who among us couldn't stand to be a little more cultured?


Tuesday Kickstart: Those Who Can't, Twerk

I should probably start this post by warning you not to go any further if you've been feeling a tad suicidal lately.

From Playboy:
Teaching is a noble profession. Without teachers, how would people learn the necessary skills to get through life? Likewise, twerking also provides a valuable service to the community. How else would young men satisfy their badonkadonk cravings?

Jessica Vanessa decided we had too many of the former and not enough of the latter so the Florida schoolteacher left her job to twerk professionally. That might sound stupid, but it's not. Advertisers pay her six figures to create bootylicious videos for her more the 2 million Vine followers. And if the twerking trend eventually dies down, she can go back to teaching where young men will continue admiring her rear end while she's writing on chalkboards.



This is all so confusing to me. Every fiber of my admittedly-cynical being wants to clown the hell out of this woman for being a "professional twerker," but...she's making more than twice my yearly salary by doing it. Really, it's not even right for me to post this as a Kickstart. Who feels any kind of motivation to attack the workweek now that they know shaking their ass on the internet pays better? A lot better. *sigh*

Hell, now I'm not even sure that a certified stunner like Yesenia Bustillo could help cheer me up:


...okay, she can. She definitely can. Let's go.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Throwback Thursday: "2nd Round KO" — Canibus

This song blew up overnight. Most people (beyond the underground scene) had barely ever heard of Canibus when he appeared on LL's "4, 3, 2, 1" (where the virtual-unknown stole the show). Then a few weeks after that track hit the airwaves, "2nd Round KO" came out of nowhere like an assassin in the night to wipe Cool James's days as a feared emcee off the planet. From the the coup of getting Iron Mike Tyson to cameo, to the line-for-line lethal lyrics—many of which call out LL on everything people were afraid (at the time) to say about him in public, this track was like a audio guerrilla warfare, polarizing and downright brutal. LL tried to respond with "The Ripper Strikes Back," a god awful attempt at flexing lyrical muscle he just didn't have at that point in his career.

At the time of this song's release, I actually had some people tell me—speaking from some kind of ridiculous slave mentality—that Canibus, no matter how badly LL had wronged him, was wrong for challenging LL, simply because he was a hall of fame emcee. Fuck. That. LL deserved everything he got. Like Chris Rock said, "ain't no one above an ass-whoopin'."


Monday, October 6, 2014

Going Out on Top

Sometimes SNL has no chill.


Monday Kickstart: Can't Even

Being that it's Monday morning, I'm guessing most of us can sympathize with this cat named Simon, who is coming up short on fucks to give.

From Tastefully Offensive:
Morgan James took his cats, Simon and Wash, to his local park for some outside adventure, but Simon wasn't having any of it.


Ironic that it's the active cat that's named "Wash." And why, exactly, is this guy trying to walk cats? I love cats, I grew up with cats in my household, and I never once thought trying to take them for a walk would be anything short of insane. Looks like Simon agrees with me.

But, like with Simon and his owner, this workweek is going to insist upon dragging us with it, no matter how much we resist. Maybe Ms. Daniella Dior can help put us in a more businesslike state of mind:


Let's go.

Friday, October 3, 2014

On the Spot

This kid's flow is ridiculous. And you've gotta love his mom and dad not only being at the studio, but being involved in the video. There's a lot of promise here.


Thursday, October 2, 2014

Throwback Thursday: "Oochie Coochie" -- MC Brains ft. Tam Rock

This is officially an IDGAF post. This track was just fun when it was released, and easily captured my 13-year-old attention. Therefore it forever holds a spot in my heart. Yeah, it's obnoxious. And the lyricism sucks. And it's slightly demeaning to women. But let's see how you young bucks feel about "Anaconda" 22 years from now.


Monday, September 29, 2014

#BBQ4Merica

Wendy's just won it all with this one.


Monday Kickstart: Setting the Mood

Honestly, this is a million times better than any of the real Cialis ads.


...and nine months later, Iggy Azalea was born.

And if you need something even stronger than Cialis Turnt to get you going, then look no further than Miss October 2013, Carly Lauren:


Let's go.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Monday, September 22, 2014

Respect My Gangsta: Charlo Greene

If Charlo isn't already married, I'm proposing just as soon as my flight to Alaska lands. Go figure the only black woman in Alaska is gangsta as fuckkkk...

[You'll need to turn up the sound, the quality is pretty bad.]



For more on the tale of this gangsta that's stolen my heart, check out Mashable.

Monday Kickstart: Friend or Foe

If you want to find out who someone truly is, just be sure to ask the right questions.



Yeah, that new Key & Peele is going to be real. Season Four is just a few days away.

For this week's inspiration, allow me to introduce the intoxicating Alee Rose:



Let's go.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Throwback Thursday: "One Sweet Day" -- Mariah Carey ft. Boyz II Men

Last week, we skipped the regular weekly Throwback Thursday post. Normally that's a sign of me either being too tied up with work, or too absent-minded to remember to put together a post. Neither was the case in this instance, however.

Those who've paid attention have surely figured out that my attention was shifted elsewhere by the sudden and gut-wrenching news I received that morning. In my writings for this site I'm always honest, first and foremost, so I'll tell you that I can't remember a 72-hour period during my life when I've shed more tears. You'll forgive me, then, for this week's Throwback being of a decidedly different nature than the norm.

Given these recent events, though, nothing seems more fitting than this song. Otis was an incredible singer, and a huge fan of R&B. And this 1995 Mariah and Boyz II Men hit harkens back my high school years, when Otis, myself, and the rest of our crew seemed to have the whole world ahead of us. The photos and stories my friends and I have shared this past week have brought that time back to mind vividly and often. I can only hope we get to experience that feeling again in the next life, homie. Love you, O. Be at peace, and rest knowing we all miss you.


Monday, September 15, 2014

Monday Kickstart: The Taste of Self-Centeredness

This clip has been around the internet for a few weeks, but casual racism has been around for a lot longer than that, sooo...



Post-racial America, indeed. Shifting the focus towards more positive aspects of our society, this week's inspiration is a friend of a friend, who's doing her thing out there in the modeling world. I'm speaking, of course, about Pittsburgh's own Mia Bella:


(And for those of you wondering: Yes, she's just as cool as she is hot.) Let's go.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

The Most Powerful Weapon

I've been... I've been better. These last few days have been a strange mixture of nostalgia and regret, connection and loss, hopelessness and resolve. I can hear 18-year-old versions of Otis and I laughing like ghosts on a fall breeze. And as difficult as I've found this week on a personal level, the world is seemingly falling apart around all of us, from Ferguson to Iraq to everywhere in between. I think I'm ready for a restart. I think I'm ready for the world to begin again, like Prince EA talks about here. Even if it doesn't mean seeing O again, at least it would mean creating a world that would do justice to the short time he got to spend here.