Friday, March 30, 2012

It's the Weekend

Time to go big or go home...

Happy National Cleavage Day

I don't know who created this fantastic day of celebration, but he or she is certainly a sainted soul. And one day after my birthday, no less. I feel honored.

Although it's called "National" Cleavage Day, it appears it's fans circle the globe. Here (courtesy of The Huffington Post) we have video from London, where Ann Summers sponsored a bit of a Cleavage Day Parade, if you will.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Throwback Thursday: "If I Ruled the World" -- Nas ft. Lauryn Hill

Since today is my birthday (thank you, thank you...*catches a bra* thank you), I'm giving you one of my all-time favorite tracks. There may not be a more harmonious combination of lyrics, message, flow, beat, and guest vocals (Lauryn does the damn thing).

Imagine that...

Monday, March 26, 2012

Monday Kickstart: Off to an Honest Start


Spotted at Sex, Cigars & Booze

Upstairs by shawnwines

The final line kills me.

And now, for this week's eye-opener. Since my birthday is this week (or maybe just because I can), I'm giving you a double shot. Here are my two favorite submissions from last week's Frisky Friday fun on Twitter: I give you Ms. Alexa De Lugo...

...and Ms. Deserae Trujillo.

*shivers* You're doing it right, ladies. Let's get it.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Throwback Thursday: "You Came Up" -- Big Pun ft. Noreaga

There's no denying Pun's first LP, Capitol Punishment, was a classic. Just about every beat was on point, and perfectly showcased his smooth-but-rapid flow and effortless lyricism. People forget, though, that Pun's sense of humor was just as big as his talent, and went a long way to him becoming an instant success. And this video—though it doesn't synch up with the song's lyrics (a pet peeve of mine)—brings out a bit more of his charismatic jokester side.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Tail Report: Rukus vs. Primitive

*pauses* I get the feeling that title just accidentally lured in a big video game geek crowd.

Okay, I admit I got this idea (and some most all of the videos...and basically the whole thing) from Girlwatcher's latest post at The Smoking Jacket. Now do you want to keep sitting around a computer screen criticizing, or do you want to look at some of the world's most beautiful women? Yup, that's what I thought.

Team Rukus

My schoolboy crush, Ms. Jessica Burciaga:

Natasha Yi: [I'll be honest...she stopped following me on Twitter over a year ago, and my pride makes me want to ignore her. But this woman is gorgeous. Plus, prior to the sudden Twit-diss, she seemed pretty cool. That's worth at least one more mention on CS.]

Alexis Lopez (aye mami...don't worry fellas, I think Alexis is going to get a well-deserved posting of her own in the near future):

Team Primitive

Justene Jaro (*whimper*)

Desiree Elyda (Don't know much about her, but...I'm learning.)

Alexis Lopez—that's right, she plays for both teams. The hottest girls always do.

Moving at the Speed of Dumb

You've probably seen or heard this by now, but...

As irreversibly feeble-minded as this poor girl is, there's something bigger that should be highlighted here.

As a man who's had his fair share of arguments with women, there's one undeniable fact: They are illogical beings. For example, I once forced an introduction at a bar between a cute bartender and my boy; when she heard the story a few days later, my girlfriend at the time got mad at me, because she considered that act to be me flirting and/or cheating.

True story.

Now, to be fair, that's a bit of an extreme case. But even in little, everyday disagreements, men are constantly being flustered and frustrated by women as they use irrational jumps in logic to support their side of the dispute. Sadly, it's an inescapable fact of nature; it seems nearly all women suffer from this flaw [It seems wrong to completely generalize all women as having an inability to process logic; surely, there must be some who are rational. But, in my 33 years, I don't think I have found one yet, so...]. Even my mother, who I love more than anything else in the world, is often victim to ridiculous reasoning. It doesn't make me love her any less, though it does shorten my visits on occasion.

This isn't to say that a woman is always wrong when arguing with a man—I mean, she IS, but I'm not saying that (jokes, ladies...ease back). But when a woman is wrong, typically she's not going to stop and accept a logical view of the debate. The beauty of this video is that it so perfectly shines a spotlight on this tendency. No reasonable woman can watch this lass Chelsea stumble around the math problem using various mind-boggling pieces of "data" ("I run a mile in about 9 minutes"...huh?) and then vehemently defend her answer while simultaneously discrediting her husband ("I make sense—you do not make sense!"), and not catch a glimpse into the pain any man has ever felt when dealing with this type battle between the logical and the illogical.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Joell Ortiz Gives 'em a Little Michael McDonald

The younger generation of music fans may not know who Michael McDonald is, though you may recognize some of his songs--more accurately, you may recognize the beats from some of his songs, which have been sampled by various artists. One such song is "I Keep Forgettin'", which Warren G used for "Regulators" (R.I.P. Nate Dogg). Indeed, the hip-hop world is well aware of McDonald's legacy.

From HipHop N More:
The Slaughterhouse crew is mean group of MCs but that doesn’t mean they don’t know how to have some fun. Last night at their show in Ft. Lauderdale, Joell Ortiz did a hilarious cover of singer Michael McDonald’s classic song ‘I Keep Forgetting‘ while Joe Budden busted some passionate dance moves.
This shit slayed me. Ortiz actually does a pretty damn good rendition, and Budden more than does his part to assist in the performance.

Monday, March 19, 2012

Monday Kickstart: Ryde or Die

I feel like this brother must be related to Grace Jones. You know all those over-the-top descriptions and scenarios that Old Spice uses to talk about how "powerful" their deodorant's odor-blocking skills are? You think Terry Tate watched this video and started worrying that he was about to be replaced?

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

And now, this week's motivational speaker, Ms. Genesis Rodriguez:

Well said, Genesis. Well said. Let's get it.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Community Service

Welcome back, Community.

The beautiful, hilarious creation of executive producer Dan Harmon returns tonight (NBC, 8 pm EST) after a three month hiatus. And while nothing is certain yet, there are encouraging signs (including the completion of a syndication deal with Comedy Central) that these next twelve episodes won't be the last hurrah for Jeff (Joel McHale), Britta (Gillian Jacobs), Troy (Donald Glover), Shirley (Yvette Nicole Brown), Annie (Alison Brie...delish), Abed (Danny Pudi), Pierce (Chevy Chase), and Chang (Ken Jeong). The agent working against Community, of course, is the series' often-underwhelming performance in the ratings. America's minds—much like our guts—have always preferred fat, easily-within-reach comfort food when it comes to sitcoms. Shows that dare to make you train your eyes and ears by forgoing base, unsophisticated jokes appeal to a more savvy, well-toned-mental-physique. And, sadly, they simply don't hold as many people in front of a television for 30 minutes. Harmon packs more comedy and thought into the background of a scene than most sitcom producers put into the full half hour. The show, quite simply, is the Jay-Z to other TV shows' Soulja Boys.

Yet Community, with its dazzling dialogue and repartee between characters, and its fondness for parodying cinematic genres by expertly hitting each note of each cliched trope, has amassed a strong legion of fans around the world. If you want proof of that, just search on Twitter for "#SixSeasonsAndAMovie", the war cry of my fellow Community supporters. With a little luck, the Greendale gang will add numbers to this legion—as well as gain a significant boost in the ratings—tonight and in the weeks to come. It would be well-deserved. Shows that pack as much solid and creative talent in all three of the major areas (writing, production, and acting) only come around once in a lifetime. Letting this one die would be a Chang.

Throwback Thursday: "Break Ups 2 Make Ups" -- Method Man ft. D'Angelo

Raise your hand if you have a crazy ex-girlfriend? Yup. Some of y'all have both hands raised. Let's let Meth and D speak on it for a few minutes...

Bro'ing Out the Wedding Photo

A wedding is a painful thing for a man. ...Some more so than others. If you ever needed further proof that marriage flies in the face of Darwinism, just watch this.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Tail Report: Kourtney Kardashian

Normally, CS is the frolicking grounds of her lil' sis, Kim (she even sneaks into one of the photos below). But today I thought I'd give Kourtney—the MILF Kardashian—a post of her own. Why? Because...why not?

Feng Shui

With rental prices rising, it's more important than ever to make the most of your surroundings.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Tipping Point

If you were ever a high school athlete, then more than likely you indulged in a similar daydream from time to time: With the game clock ticking towards zero in a state championship game and your team's success in your hands, you grasp the opportunity to step up and be the unquestionable hero in a moment when the stakes are at their absolute highest. It's an incredibly unrealistic scenario. Those moments aren't just once-in-a-lifetime, they're once-in-a-thousand-people's-lifetimes. It's Hollywood magic, art that real life admires from behind a velvet rope but never dares to imitate.

Well, almost never. For Josh Adams of Chaparral High School in Colorado, daydreams can't compare to reality.

Flight Time: Gerald Green

TJ thinks this is better than Blake Griffin ending any chance anyone will ever respect Kendrick Perkins' game ever again...I obviously disagree. This is a sick throwdown by Green, but without a helpless victim on the receiving end, it just isn't as awe-inspiring as Griffin's dunk.

Monday Kickstart: Keep Telling Yourself That

Yup. Know who else runs this shit? Alison Brie, that's who.

Don't hurt 'em, Alison. (You can hurt me anytime you want, though...)

P.S. — New "Community" Thursday at 8, y'all. #CoolCoolCool

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Throwback Thursday: "The Actual" -- All City

If you're wondering where All City went, don't bother asking me; I don't know either. In fact, I'd completely forgotten about them until TJ suggested this track for a Throwback post.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

We Built This City

You've got to admit, this is pretty cool.

Eight years after the release of Sim City 4, Electronic Arts has just released a trailer for its successor, Sim City 5.

From The Huffington Post:
The new game, which was unveiled at this week's Game Developers Conference in San Francisco, will be brought up to current-day speed with environmental issues affecting construction and mayors dealing with climate change, renewable energy and natural disasters as they build their cities.

...Decisions as a city builder can have pronounced effects on Sim City residents. If a player chooses to make a town economically reliant on coal mining, for example, the city will have to invest in building hospitals to keep residents from getting sick and fleeing.

"The choices that you make will affect the lives of the Sims who are there," Bradshaw said, "and you might start to see some residents protesting at City Hall."

What happens in one city can also affect a friend's town. The game will have online features where one person can play side by side with friends who are mayors of their own cities. All players globally can compete in rankings to be the greenest, the dirtiest, the fittest, or the best city in which to live.
It's good to know I'm not the only person who's been longing for a new Sim City. I played one of the early versions during study halls in high school, and 15+ year (shut it) of absence has definitely made the heart grow fonder. It's almost unfair, though, that we still have to wait another year before this game is available.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Monday Kickstart: How Does That Make You Feel?

Maybe getting it all out of your system today will help ease things the rest of the week. Maybe not. Either way, this video will at least clear your mind for a few blissful minutes.

Feel better? No? Think Kate Upton could help with that?

Yeah, I thought so. Let's go.

Friday, March 2, 2012

It's Friday

Time to be a big, bright, shining star...

Happy Birthday, Bitch!

Nothing says "and many more..." like second degree manslaughter. I wonder if her birthday wish was to be the subject of an afterschool special?

A Painful Birthday Prank Fail - Watch More Funny Videos

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Community Rises

If you're a fan of Community (and really, I find it hard to believe you'd be awesome enough to be a Crooked Straight fan if you're not a Community fan), you'll love this mashup video almost as much as you love the news that the gang from Greendale will be back with new episodes on March 15th. #sixseasonsandamovie, bitch.

Throwback Thursday: "Dear Mama" -- 2pac

Those close to me know that my mother has endured some major health issues over the last few weeks. It's been a stressful time, but I'm holding onto a cautiously-optimistic outlook. I want to dedicate this week's throwback to the woman who gave me everything I have in this world, and to remind her that I love her, and that she is appreciated.