Monday Kickstart: Action News

Some people like to start their day with the morning news. And sure, it'll inform you about what's going on in the world. But it won't dull the pain of a Monday. You need more than the news to laugh off the stress waiting for you outside your front door.

...Or do you?



One thing's for certain: The news people in Australia have a lot more fun than their American counterparts.

This week, for inspiration we turn to the scintillating Ms. Brittney Alger:

Let's go.

Know the Ledge

On the one hand, she should've known what she was in for when she got dressed that morning. On the other hand...he's probably dead now.

Lone Star

If you had told me the voice of reason with regards to racism would be a white-haired white man from Texas, I would've told you to pass the L and sit out the next rotation. Beautifully spoken wisdom by Mr. Dale Hansen.

From Bleacher Report:

With the opportunity to try to make a difference, sports anchor Dale Hansen of Dallas-Fort Worth's WFAA recently used some airtime to deliver a powerful anti-racism speech.

Respect My Gangsta: Charlo Greene

If Charlo isn't already married, I'm proposing just as soon as my flight to Alaska lands. Go figure the only black woman in Alaska is gangsta as fuckkkk...

[You'll need to turn up the sound, the quality is pretty bad.]



For more on the tale of this gangsta that's stolen my heart, check out Mashable.

Anchor's Delight

With Jimmy Fallon at the helm, The Tonight Show will never be the same again.

(And that's a good thing.)

Stay Classy, Boise

If only the female anchor's name was "Lanolin."

From UPROXX:

...I can’t say Idaho On Your Side sports director Paul Gerke’s Ron Burgundy costume was the BEST thing I saw on Halloween, but it’s certainly the costume with the best execution.

If you need proof, here’s Paul doing his entire sports recap (and the WEATHER!) as Will Ferrell’s legendary Anchorman character. Come get a taste.

Hip to the Game

Mirror mirror, on the wall,
who is the dopest sportscaster of them all?

"Adam Lefkoe...bitch."

From Deadspin:

Remember Adam Lefkoe, the guy who ingeniously slipped a bunch of wrestling references into his sportscast earlier this month? He topped himself this past Sunday by squeezing 46(!) classic hip hop references into his five-minute segment. Be sure to stick around for the well-earned mic drop at the end.

The "22 2's" line was easily my favorite.


TJ with the assist.

Monday Kickstart: Bombs Away

This is hot. From Deadspin (my boy Chris with the assist):

Please, please stick around for the anchor's reaction after the director quickly cuts from Nadrich and she (almost) seamlessly transitions to peace talks between the United States and the Taliban.

This is why you never piss off the guy in charge of editing the segments. The anchor's reaction is just priceless. I wish she'd just kept staring at the camera, not saying anything. Forever.

So, I guess that about wraps it up for this week's kic—what's that? Oh, you want your weekly motivation? Hmm, well, let me see what I can do...

Hey, Vanessa—I know you're busy ironing, but you think you can help us out?

Let's go.

Trailer: Anchorman: The Legend Continues

I'm dead off the dinner scene.

Oh, Canada

Maybe Canada's not as cold as I always thought. I'm not sure how it could be when Lisa Dutton's there.



TJ with the assist.

F is for Fail

A nice find by my boy Hollywood. Keep fucking that chicken...

Sausage Party

I like where her head's at. And judging by the smile on her co-anchor's face, her mind was way ahead of that.

Call me, ladies.

"Yooo Gonna Fuck on Meeee?"

This is Roanoke, VA news anchor Holly Pietrzak having a bad day at the office. Something on your mind, Holly?



The look on her face when she realizes what she said is priceless.

Women are Evil

"That was...cooolllld-blooooooodded!"

My fellas in the UK: If you ever cross paths with Belinda Heggen, beware her bitchy side.