The Worst

Penn State disgusts me. The NCAA disgusts me. The naive-at-best people I encounter on a daily basis who try to defend Joe Paterno disgust me. If there's truly justice in this universe, "JoePa" is burning in purgatory for his crimes against children, whose lives were ruined while he turned a blind eye in the name of achieving a record.

Monday Kickstart: Criminal Masterminds

There's a whole lot of stupid out there. And sometimes, it tries to steal your purse.


I didn't even know purse-snatching was still a thing. That's one of those phenomena you see on old TV shows and laugh at the rudimentary simplicity of it. And yet, as simple as the act would appear to be, you still have a guy dumb enough to screw it up. Who wants to bet that when police finally catch him, his head will be stuck in a banister?

Here to get you going this week is Playboy's Miss September 2012, Alana Campos:

Let's go.

F.O.H.: Parenting--You're Doing It Wrong

When your 14-year-old son steals an SUV, leads police on a chase, and then wrecks the vehicle into other motorists on the highway, your credentials as a parent are, understandably, on thin ice.

From the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette:

A 14-year-old boy was listed in critical condition after a police chase and crash on the inbound Parkway East on Sunday evening.

The boy was driving a stolen 2001 Jeep Cherokee erratically and Penn Hills police attempted to stop the vehicle on Rodi Road. It entered the parkway and crashed at about 6:15 p.m., rolling over at the Churchill interchange. The inbound side of the highway was closed for about five hours.

But hey, kids are still kids, and not every crime is evidence of poor parenting. How you, as a mother or father, react to your child's mistake goes miles towards explaining just what kind of future he will have...

In an interview with WPXI-TV this morning, the boy's mother faulted the car owner for leaving the keys in the vehicle and took police to task for chasing the car, saying it was possible he was just joyriding.

...Well, looks like he's going to be a horrible, horrible person. Just like his mother.

This is why they need to start requiring people to earn a special license before they're allowed to raise kids. Do you really have the audacity to claim your son was not fully to blame for stealing a vehicle? Newsflash, princess: When you blame the victim of your kid's crime, you're showing the world the very reason that your child is committing crime in the first place. What kind of an example is this for a 14-year-old? If I had so much as touched a parked car without explicit permission when I was that age, my mom (who raised me as a single mother for the majority of my life) would've kicked my ass for a solid half hour, and then hit me with the, "Just WAIT 'til I tell your father about this!" (As if she hadn't just put me in traction herself...)

Fuck outta here...

Respect My Gangsta: Antonio Diaz Chacon

This is the face of a hero. And a gangsta.

From Yahoo! News:

A pair of 911 calls came in quick succession.

On one, a frantic 12-year-old says her little sister is missing. On the other is Diaz Chacon's wife, Martha.

"We are outside of my mom's house here," she told the dispatcher. "We heard a man going, 'Hey, hey let her go. Let her go.' So we turn around ...

"The man came running to us and said, 'They stole a little girl.'"

Phillip Garcia, 29, had snatched the girl moments earlier, taking her away in a blue van, police said.

Diaz Chacon jumped in his black pickup and gave chase.

It wasn't until the van crashed and the driver got out that any sense of fear set in for Diaz Chacon.

"When he got down I was thinking, what if he has a gun," he said.

Garcia fled on foot, and Diaz Chacon reached the girl and told her he would take her home. Garcia then returned to his wrecked van and took off but was later captured by police, authorities said.

Hidden under a rock just 25 feet from the van was packing tape and a tie-down strap, police said.

Inside the impounded van were tostadas, a glove, a Leatherman tool, a black satchel, orange strapping similar to the strap found hidden under the rock, police said.

"This little girl was very lucky," police Sgt. Tricia Hoffman said. "We can only guess what would have happened to this child."

Unwavering heroism in the face of evil. Much respect to you, Mr. Diaz Chacon. It's good to know there are still some heroes out in the world.