Auto Eroticism: Maserati Quattroporte

It's the 2013 North American International Auto Show in Detroit, and new cars are being thrown at us almost as hard this week as Big Bang Theory has been for the last three years (no, I don't like that ridiculous show either). And next up for our viewing pleasure: the all-new Quattroporte.

From MSN.com:

Everything has been reworked and improved. The full-size sedan is larger and has considerably more interior and trunk space, but it weighs nearly 220 pounds less than the previous version, thanks to extensive use of aluminum in the chassis and body. Styling changes are evolutionary. The car retains key design elements such as the prominent front grille, three small side vents in the front fenders, and a triangular rear roof pillar.

New engines were designed entirely in-house and will be built under contract by corporate cousin Ferrari. The V8 displacement is downsized, but twin turbochargers boost output to 523 horsepower and 524 lb-ft of torque. That represents an increase of 18 percent and 39 percent, compared with the previous nonturbocharged V8. The new V8 is good for zero to 62 mph in 4.7 seconds and an astounding top speed of 191 mph. The only other Maserati to exceed that top speed is the MC12 supercar. A new twin-turbo V6 engine derived from the V8 makes 404 horsepower and 405 lb-ft of torque. It can be paired with all-wheel drive, which is not offered with the V8. An 8-speed automatic is the only transmission available.

Now, to my eye—which, admittedly, has its flaws—this new car barely looks any different than the current Quattroporte. There's certainly been a few tweaks to the rear of the car; but, aside from that...yeah. Not seeing anything substantial. Just like Big Bang Theory.

If I'm lucky enough to be car shopping in this price range, I'd much rather go with something more stylish and more dependable, like a BMW 7-Series or a Mercedes S-class (both of which will likely cost you less, both in sticker price and mechanic bills).