Monday Kickstart: Das Beat

I took three and a half years of German classes in high school, but only because the teacher was so bad that the classes were easy A's. I didn't learn much German beyond "Danke schoen" in those three-plus years, and I probably really only learned that from Ferris Bueller. So I'm not going to pretend I have the foggiest idea what the gents in Rakede, a group from Germany, are saying below. But damn it if these guys can't throw down on a beat.



This week's inspiration is sex wrapped in sex, though she prefers to be called Ashley Heinrichs:

Let's go.

Respect My Gangsta: German Motorcyclist

Welcome to Thunderdome, bitch. Everyone knows you don't bring a horn to a hammer fight.

German Chocolate

Personally, I tear up a plate of beets every time I go to the Hofbrauhaus.

Key and Peele

Disappearing Act

If your Monday has been like mine, then you know how Michel (the blonde kid) feels.

If you feel like Sven...well fuck you then, punk.

That Old Lost Love Feeling

Stop me if you've heard this one before: A German Chancellor is preaching religious intolerance.

From Yahoo! News:

BERLIN (AFP) – Germany's attempt to create a multi-cultural society has failed completely, Chancellor Angela Merkel said at the weekend, calling on the country's immigrants to learn German and adopt Christian values.

Merkel weighed in for the first time in a blistering debate sparked by a central bank board member saying the country was being made "more stupid" by poorly educated and unproductive Muslim migrants.

In the U.S., Europe is often looked to as being a consistent employer of more progressive and modern political and sociological views. But Merkel's statements reveal an undercurrent of unenlightened, religiously-biased sentiment that America, though often guilty of (see "Ground Zero Mosque"), rarely sees exhibited by her distant relatives in Europe. It's often assumed that European civilization, having experienced the perils and pitfalls of various societal structures for roughly 1600 years longer than the U.S., has already learned from the mistakes and troubling biases that continue to trip up the American political system (see "Tea Party movement"). But it now appears that, at least in the case of Germany, that was only a false hope.

David Hasselhoff Ain't the Only Thing Germans Love

No one—and I mean NO ONE—outdoes Germany when it comes to over-the-top weirdness. I haven't even quite figured out exactly what this product is: perfume for punany or punany-scented perfume. Either way...wtf?

If nothing else, I bet this makes Brazil rethink its ban of Paris Hilton's Devassa ad. That commercial looks like a third grade play compared to this.



For more on Vulva, check out the official website (which is only for the 18 and over crowd).