Monday Kickstart (Part 1): Not Your Typical Politician

This is a real Canadian politician, running for office in British Columbia, in a real political ad.



It's recently come to my attention that marijuana is legal in British Columbia. Just saying...

Monday Kickstart (Part 1): Whip 'Em into Shape

"Watch Me" has lowkey become the meme of the summer, as more and more videos of people doing the Whip come out. And, though the saturation point can't be too far away, we thankfully haven't hit it just yet. That means we can still enjoy the randomness and infectiousness of an Atlanta area chiropractic practice that decided to get in on the act.

#BBQ4Merica

Wendy's just won it all with this one.

What Does It All Mean

I'm mad I never saw this Kobe System ad before. It would take an ego like Kobe's to put Kanye's ego in check.

Can't Handle

This isn't The Hero. Nope. Not at all. *looking around*

*backs away slowly*



TJ with the find (blame him, Kev) on Deadspin.

Proud

Seriously, fuck Daniel Snyder.

"Tell 'em I said 'Have a Coke and a Smile and Shut the Fuck Up.'"

I avoided discussing the Coke ad controversy racism/xenophobia when it all went down a few months ago. But having just seen this excellent response to it all by WXIA Atlanta's Brenda Wood, I'll simply say "ditto." And I'll also echo TJ's response upon seeing this clip: "Why'd they cut the video before the mic drop?"

Three Times an MVP

Give Kevin Hart a microphone, and you have a commercial. You don't have to bother writing or rehearsing anything. Just let his mind and mouth take it there.

Monday Kickstart: Sexy But Tasteful

Newcastle should've made the ad. Would've been better than any of the other Super Bowl ads that aired last night. Hell, even this reading of it is better than any of the ads that aired last night.



For inspiration this week, look no further than Ms. Danielle Mae Sheehan:

Let's go.

Good to be Bad

Not sure if I want a Jaguar F-Type or to be British.

Like A Glove

God I love Australians. I predict I'll be replacing this embedding code 120000000 times in the next month, as everyone who uploads it to their YouTube account has it mysteriously deleted.

Split Decision

JCVD doesn't have nuts. He can't possibly. This is the work of a man who knows no reason to fear a torn scrotum.




My girl Steph with the assist.

Monday Kickstart: Thinking Outside the Box

Everyday, we come one step closer to marijuana being legalized across the country. Several states have already passed legislation to allow people to light it up as they please. And big corporations are scrambling to be the first to cash in on it.

From UPROXX:

Fast food chain Jack In The Box have a new ad campaign that might just appeal to a certain demographic – specifically, the kind that think it’s a good idea to eat 1,500 calories late at night. I’m talking about stoners. Fans of the marijuana. The Mary-Jane. The sticky-icky. The pot, the reefer, the grass, daddy-o.

The future is going to be so weird. I think I'm going to buy stock in Funyuns.

Speaking of feeling lightheaded, allow me to introduce Ms. Leia Christiana:

Smokin'. Let's go.

Tuesday Kickstart: More than Meets the Eye

Yeah, I'm a not-so-low-key Transformers nerd, but this commercial has been cracking me up since last night.



I'm kind of surprised it took this long for them to play off the whole Megatron nickname.

So, you're probably wondering why this week's Kickstart is coming to you on a Tuesday, despite Monday not being a holiday (like, for instance, last week). Well, here's the thing: I kind of forgot to prepare a post on Sunday. I was barely-can-stay-awake, about-to-vomit-at-any-moment hungover after this year's 837 Bar Crawl on Saturday. Combine that with the first Sunday action of the NFL season, and, well, shit happens. Next week's Kickstart will return to Mondays, as per regularly-scheduled blogging. But, I want you to know that Shanina Shaik and I are very, very sorry...

Well, actually, there's nothing "sorry" about Shanina. Let's go.

Special K

Do kids still kick yo mama jokes? I feel like that can't still be a thing, that it's from my time so it can't possibly exist for anyone younger than me. Regardless, cool work by Kmart on this one.

Make-Ups to Wake-Ups

Mini of Mexico knows how to get a woman's attention.

Just because it's sexist, doesn't mean it's not true. From Autoblog:

Publicis, the advertising agency used by Mini in Mexico, came up with an inventive (or offensive, depending on your point of view) way of reminding female drivers "that there's a time and place for everything." And while we're not quite sure of the veracity of the statistics cited in the video below, or even the necessity of its production in general, perhaps we'll just take it as a reminder to pay attention while driving... no matter what else happens to be on our minds. Or faces, as it were.

It's the Weekend

Time to get more than you asked for...



Tony with the assist.

Presidential Lovin'

I can't...

Big Girls Don't Cry Wolf

I was uncomfortable. I was outraged. I was…jealous.

Some undeserving clown was kissing Bar Rafaeli, and it wasn’t me. I should be that undeserving clown!

A lot of people have had a lot to say about the Go Daddy ad that aired during the Super Bowl, which featured an international supermodel (Miss Rafaeli) doing tongue-jujitsu with a nerdy, overweight guy (Jesse Heiman). Very little of what was said was positive. Scratch that; none of it was positive.

And while—at first—those disapproving voices seemed only to be agreeing with me, I began to see things differently once my own selfish ire wore off. If my initial disdain for a meaningless television commercial was born from my desire to be the one lip-lockin’ with Bar, what was fueling the wave of criticisms from everyone else? Over the years, Go Daddy’s sexually-charged stunts have slowly desensitized us to each new ad they’ve released. Why should this one suddenly awaken new disgust? Were Entertainment Weekly writers, newspaper columnists, and talk show hosts only chiming in because they were jealous, too? Perhaps, in some cases. But more and more, it now feels like something far worse: bigotry.

Let’s imagine, for just a second, that the man swirling tongues with Bar in that ad had been Channing Tatum. Just what would the public response have been? I, and other gents such as myself, would likely still be outraged for a good minute or two, simply because it wasn’t us. Tatum’s wife, Jenna Dewan, might also be a little peeved (also due to jealousy). But would the mass public’s sentiment have been as harsh? Would "backlash" have been an accurate term to describe the entertainment media’s reaction to watching two hot, consenting adults get mouth-friendly to promote a web domain service that no one knows is a web domain service? Highly unlikely. That’s not to say no media mouthpiece would speak against the ad. But you’re fooling yourself if you think he or she would spend more than 140 Twitter characters on the subject.

Quite simply, the objection towards this Go Daddy ad exists solely because the male lead is unattractive. He was chubby. He was nerdy. He was ginger! *shivers* How dare they force such lechery upon our chaste eyes!

Now, for the sake of argument, let’s look at this story from another angle: How would all of this have been treated if the model had been male, and the nerd had been female? If…some guy [admittedly, the only male model’s name that I know of is Derek Zoolander], some Adonis whose jaw line was chiseled from a marble slab and whose abs could stop a bullet, was passionately kissing an overweight and unappealing woman in glasses, would we hear those same judgmental voices crying out in the name of decency? Hell, not only would those people be silent, at this very moment they’re probably a click away from attacking me for suggesting a hypothetical woman is “overweight and unappealing”.

And there you have it, the double-standard. Attractive man + attractive woman? Stamp of approval. Attractive man + unattractive, chubby woman? The next Rebel Wilson. Unattractive, chubby man + attractive woman? Not on MY television!

Why is it okay for everyone to be repulsed when a male romantic lead bears the deficit in physical beauty? The audacity that it takes to perpetuate this fraud of social mores is staggering. And yet it seems to have slipped past almost all of us without so much as a second thought on our parts. When a woman doesn’t fit the Hollywood norm, she’s an inspiration; when a man doesn’t, he’s a punchline.

Now, to be fair, for years Hollywood has enforced much stricter physical requirements on women than on men. While everyone from Jackie Gleason to Steve Buscemi have played leading men who’ve gotten the girl, it’s only been more recently that the door has cracked open for “regular gals”. [Sidenote: This is a term that’s ridiculously misused; Melissa McCarthy and Adele are both extremely talented women, but they’re not “regular” when it comes to body types. Let’s just be honest, here. I am far from the Channing Tatum end of the spectrum. But I’m also not delusional enough to think that being out-of-shape makes me as big as Billy Gardell. And I wouldn’t refer to Gardell as a “regular guy” just because we both need to cut back on carbs.] Lena Dunham is proving, one uncomfortable-for-everyone-but-her nude scene at a time, that women don’t have to be off-duty swimsuit models to be stars. We’re in the dawn of a girl-power era, and the result is “unlikely” leading ladies such as Wilson and McCarthy. But, if it’s wrong for society to be offended when one of these ladies kisses her hot male costar, why isn’t this true when genders are reversed and it’s Go Daddy’s nerd lothario? For all of the pro-curves, equality-for-big-gals cheerleading that occurs today in pop culture and social media, where’s all of the support when the person in question is male?

The move towards less-unrealistic standards for leading ladies is certainly refreshing. But centuries of misogyny won’t be erased by a sudden overcompensation in the opposite—yet equally unfair—direction.

*puts on pair of glasses* Now, Bar: About a follow-up ad…

Trade Threats

Score one for Kris Humphries. Someone's graduated from special ed.