A Cold Sore IED?

Rumor has it that Amy Bishop, the biology professor behind the February 12th shooting at the University of Huntsville-Alabama, planted a "herpes bomb" somewhere on campus. Experts assure, though, that the effectiveness of such a device would be very minimal, given the fragile nature of the virus.

In order for a herpes bomb to make anyone sick, the virus particles would first have to survive the explosion and then be thrown into direct contact with a victim's mucosal surface, like the insides of his mouth or genitals, or into his eyes. They could also land on a wound or open sore, and thus enter his bloodstream directly. Plus, if Bishop's bomb hasn't gone off yet, it probably expired several days ago. Herpes can't last more than a couple of days outside the body at room temperature, even in a pH-balanced saline solution.

Of course, if Bishop's weapon exists, it wouldn't be the first "herpes bomb" to be inflicted upon the mass populace—


—though it would be far less douchey.